“Lynne, slow down and listen” are my sister’s constant words to me. She used these words to mean listen with your heart and your eyes. These are Janice’s words, words that came from love, and they are still ringing in my ears as I stand on this podium.
Good morning, my name is Lynne. Thank you for joining us in celebrating our sister Janice’s life, and the legacy she left behind.
Janice, was a sister, step mum to Lisa, friend, aunt, cousin, work colleague or acquaintance and each one would have had a different relationship with her.
Janice was the fourth of six children born to our parents and although we, like many other families in Zambia and latterly Zimbabwe, were not affluent, we grew up as a closeknit family unit whose parents instilled in us qualities which included a strong sense of responsibility and respect both for ourselves and to others.
From a young age Janice had many interests and participated in many clubs and societies. Janice was educated at a Catholic boarding school, St Johns’s in Avondale, Harare where she was a prefect, a member of the tennis and swimming first teams and on leaving school was a member of Country Club ladies hockey team.
Jance was definitely the apple of my father’s eye. Her teachers loved her too. She’d bring back home reports with straight A’s, while I struggled to not be an average pumpkin.
On hockey tours to Malawi as well as tournaments in Zimbabwe she was hugely involved in fundraising, was great fun and always looked after the younger members of the team making sure there was always enough hydration available (make of that what you will).
Janice got the best of both worlds, only because she worked hard for it. She made life happen!
On a more serious note, Janice was a devout Catholic who was an active member of the St Vincent de Paul conference in Wellingborough, participating in the Street Meals project, the Christmas Fair etc. She was a member of the Lyons and was also spiritual. She was a member of a Crystal Group, which she always fondly referred to as her Crystal buddies with whom she shared many happy times and created good, meaningful memories.
My sister grew up to be sensitive and understanding woman. Janice was private, and often her kind and gentle qualities were mistaken for weakness; she believed that people were inherently good and had good intentions; she would often give people the benefit of the doubt (yes, she and I often disagreed strongly on this point as sadly I am both less tolerant of unkindness and injustice as well as less forgiving).
Although it was not in her nature to be confrontational, Janice was no push over, she would not sacrifice her ethics nor would she compromise on quality or safety and she would not take short cuts as can be attested to by her work colleagues.
Recently, I received a message from a gentleman who was Janice’s Lecturer when she was studying for her Civil and Structural Engineering degree in Zimbabwe in the early 1980’s and he mentioned that it was only after he retired back to the US and it was only on looking back on his time in Zimbabwe, that he began to see a pattern to Janice’s outward mindset. He began to appreciate the difficulties of those growing up in a racist as well as a sexist environment in Zimbabwe and the coping mechanisms that our family along with other coloured families adopted to achieve their goals. This Lecturer stated that throughout his tenure, he met several other “bi-racial”, (the politically correct terminology for Coloured girls with the same open and friendly smile, the same polite manner, dignity, honour and elegance. The high achievers who would not allow anyone or anything to prevent them from fulfilling their potential. His words resonated when he said, Janice defeated the ‘nay sayers’ with love and that is what made her a strong individual when it mattered the most. Janice often said to me that after working so hard and overcoming such odds to achieve her dream in what was, and sadly still is perceived as a “male” industry, she was not prepared to lower the standards she fought so hard to achieve.
Janice’s dedication to quality and correctness did not make her a boring person. No, please don’t get that idea. She could be the light of the party and still act like a responsible person! She could make you laugh by adding that tinge of mischievous sarcasm. She carried this to the very end.
Unfortunately, Janice is gone too soon. This is a painful time for the family, but we will never lose hope. We know my sister is watching over us and we will try to never disappoint her.
I promise you, Janice I will walk that pilgrimage, make those sausage rolls, love and take care of our loved ones and stay by their side till my last breath. I will try to listen with my heart and my eyes. You gave me a sisterly relationship that I will forever cherish.
Again, thank you all so much for being here. Your compassion gives us a lot of strength. I know Janice is in a peaceful realm, where she is laying the foundation for a new legacy! For this woman will never rest without making her presence known.
I would like to close with the following words:
That night we found you in eternal sleep;
We tried to wake you as we began to weep,
But all our pleas you could not hear;
Oh if I could have been with you at the very end,
Oh If I could only have kept you near,
Away from the voices of those who went before,
Who beckoned you to come to that distant shore.
Although I cry and stand grief-stricken today,
I promise not to forget the loving memories you gave;
But still I miss you so very much my sister dear,
And your caring words I once again long to hear;
My heart’s only solace is one day I will see you as before,
Beckoning me to come join you on that white distant shore.
I love you, Janice. Forever and more. Wherever you are, stay blessed and happy.